Who doesn’t love Top Ten lists right?  Find a common interest with anyone you meet, and you can spend hours arguing over a top ten anything; best baseball players of all time, funniest movies of all time, best Tumblr blogs of all time (tho your list doesn’t count if Vandy 311 isn’t on there).  Rather than make another generic one, tho, I spent some time coming up with one that I don’t think anyone’s published before, and unless you have as big a man crush on him as I do, you probably haven’t even thought of it either.  Without further ado, I give you…

The Top Ten Songs FEATURING Drake So Far (Gone… HA!): 

10. Deuces (Remix) - Chris Brown (also feat. T.I., Kanye West, Fabolous, Rick Ross & Andre 3000)

I can’t even explain how much I hate Chris Brown.  I deleted every song I had by him off my iPod after he hit Rihanna, and I won’t even sit in a room if his shit’s playing.  So imagine how conflicted I was when this song came out, especially since Drizzy KILLS IT!!!  It’s like when Kobe gets the ball for Team USA… IDK what to do.  This song definitely would be higher if not for the fact that it was Chris Brown.  And wouldn’t be on the list at all if Drake didn’t outdo 4 of the best MC’s in the world and Rick Ross.  

Best line: “But I’ll fuck you right I will, I’ll fuck you right I will, I’ll fuck you like no one has ever ever made you feel” 

9. Unusual - Trey Songz 

This is a great fuckin’ song even before Drake comes in.  But I always crack up at the idea of some chick falling over a railing like one of the Three Stooges while Drake’s having sex with her from the back.  Call me a wacko, but picture the situation first.  Yeah, thought so. 

Best line: “You can come to me city, I’ll take you all over/And hit you on the balcony, just don’t fall over” (LOL)

8. What’s My Name? - Rihanna

I didn’t have this on the list originally, but then I listened to it and realized that made me a horrendous human being.  I’m not gonna lie and pretend that these aren’t two of my very favorite musicians in the game right now.  Like if I was a famous singer, these would probably be the first two I’d wanna do a song with (differently of course… otherwise I’d get totally shown up as bad as #1).  I seem to be one of the only people in the world who likes the math joke in the song, but you know what, if you don’t, you can perform the square root of 69 on me.  HA.

Best line: “The square root of 69 is 8 something, right?/Cause I’ve been tryin’ to work it out” (HA)

7. In The Morning - J. Cole

It’s appropriate that Drake’s only collaboration with J. Cole is a raunchy sex song cause I fucking cream myself every time I think about the two of them rapping in the same room.  I also like that the two actually collaborated, as in rapped about the same topic, even playing off each other, instead of just trying to outdo each other with meaningless bravado like most young rappers do when they’re on the same track.  My two favorite young artistes (yes with an e) in hip-hop by far. 

Best line: “Baby you winter time cold/The night is still young, drink that dinner wine slow/I’m trying to make the goose bumps on your inner thigh show”

6. Moment 4 Life - Nicki Minaj

The only reason I put this song above “In The Morning” is cause Drake really makes this song.  The beat is hot, no doubt, but Nicki was CLEARLY like, “I got Drake on this track, so I’m just gonna half-ass my verse and hope nobody’ll notice,” which is exactly what happened.  

Best line: “I’m really trying to make it more than what it is/Cause everybody dies but not everybody lives”

5. I’m On One - DJ Khaled (also feat. Rick Ross & Lil’ Wayne)

This is a great example of why artists who are paying Drake for a verse might as well give him the chorus too.  He steps up and takes the lead, letting Ricky Rozay and Weezy play supporting roles, which about exhausts Rick Ross’ limits and Wayne is probably more than happy to do since he writes like 6 songs a day.  

Best line: “All I care about is money and the city that I’m from/I’m a sip until I feel it, I’m a smoke it til it’s done/I don’t really give a fuck and my excuse is that I’m young”

4. Right Above It - Lil’ Wayne

Wayne’s done so many collaborations it’s a wonder he doesn’t have some type of musical STD (some might disagree…).  But this is the only instance I can think of where somebody slaughters Wayne before he even gets a chance to spit a bar.  The first time I heard this song, I yelled “Oh, SHIT!” so loud during the middle of Drake’s verse that my mom had to come in my room to make sure I was okay.  

Best line: “We walk the same path, but got on different shoes/Live in the same building, but we got different views” (Oh, SHIT!)

3. Say Something - Timbaland

Not gonna lie, this was the official Vandy 311 pong anthem when me and Mannie Fresh were running the table, and it powered us to a lot of victories.  Great memories with this track.  Also, it’s catchier than the plague.  Anytime you pair the best young rapper in the world with the producer with the most hit songs in hip-hop history (totally pulling that out of my ass) the result is gonna be amazing, but I gotta nominate this as the most underrated song of both Drake and Timbaland’s careers.  How this didn’t hit #1 on the Hot 100 I will never know… I blame Timbaland’s rapping.  

Best line: “I am the topic of conversation/It’s a celebration” (I bet Drake’s the best man at his own wedding)

2. Money To Blow - Birdman (also feat. Lil’ Wayne)

Usually growing to like an artist is a gradual and organic process, but for me, there were four defining moments that changed the way I viewed Drake. 

1) Hearing “Best I Ever Had” for the first time (okay, this is a great song but I have no idea who the fuck Drake is)

2) Hearing “Forever” (okay, Drake is a great rapper, but not as great as he thinks he is)

3) Hearing Thank Me Later (okay, Drake is much better than I’ve been giving him credit for)

4) Hearing “Money To Blow” (HOLY SHIT DRAKE IS A BEAST!!!!)

There’s about a million superlatives I could use to describe Drake’s performance on this song.  For the sake of brevity (as though you give a shit if you’ve read this far), the genius thing about it is that he goes over all the different ways that he defines swagger, then acknowledges his guilt about his colossal swag (is there really more to life than swag?  say it ain’t so Drake) and does it all with more swag than anyone has ever done anything ever outside of Boston sports or killing Osama bin Laden.  Oh, and did you even notice the Auto-Tune?  The one and only example of “I am going to use Auto-Tune like a whore just to keep my swag from blowing up your earphones” swag.  

Best line: “Yes I make mistakes that I don’t ever make excuses for/Like leaving girls that love me and constantly seducin’ hoes” (if I had to only choose one part)

Edit: I realized after the fact that I left “4 My Town (Play Ball)” off this list, and then realized after that realization that it’s pretty much an exact replica of “Money To Blow” but not quite as good.  So to compromise (and yes these things do bother me), consider it included here as part of the “Money To Blow” entry.  Like a free espresso shot in your Dunkin’ iced coffee.  Word. 

1. Aston Martin Music - Rick Ross (also feat. Chrisette Michelle)

There has never, ever, ever, ever, ever, EVER, been a better example of a song that got the main artist and the featured artist more confused than Aston Martin Music By Rick Ross Featuring Drake.  The way Drake just takes over this song and then pushes it to another level is indescribable.  It’s like Rick Ross even knew that Drake was on some higher-level type shit in the recording studio, which is why he doesn’t even make a peep for the last 4 minutes of the track.  This is the musical equivalent of what would happen if you asked Michael Jordan to join your intramural basketball team in 1992.  

You can’t really even blame Rick Ross either.  This isn’t even the same thing as when Eminem gave Jay-Z “Renegade” for The Blueprint and then totally out-rapped him on it.  Ricky already had this ill beat from J.U.S.T.I.C.E. League, a great hook from Chrisette Michelle, and (what he thought) were two totally well-done verses.  He probably thought, “I want this to be the biggest hit of my career, so I’m gonna bring in Drake for a short bridge to push this to the top of the charts.”  Then Drake gets up on some Great Gatsby swag and basically breaks down the psychological makeup of a man who has (almost) everything but still needs more, and all Rick can say is “damn, I just wanted to do a song about CARS!”  Just a magnificent performance.  

Best line: “Havin’ lunch and debatin’ Ferrari prices/Twenty-three and goin’ through a midlife crisis/But trust me, I still deliver like a midwife/And no I’m not sayin’ I’m the nicest, I just live life like it”

Well, there it is.  Amazing the things we can do when the Sox game is on so you don’t feel like you’re wasting your time while you’re doing them.  If you think I left something out, or you just wanna tell me how swagtastic this post was, feel free to leave me a message in my inbox.  Swag recognize swag.  

Deuces